Maturity is achieved when a person postpones immediate pleasures for long-term values. ~Joshua L. Liebman
Emotional immaturity is a big trigger for overeating. We can be emotionally immature at any age; it doesn’t really matter what our chronological age is. If we have been using food as a coping tool for most of our lives, we haven’t learned adult level coping skills. As long as we use food to cope, we will remain immature.
What does emotional immaturity look like?
- Needs instant gratification
- Egocentricity – takes everything personally (it’s all about meeeee!)
- Has a hard time regulating emotions
- Poor impulse control
- Has a temper tantrum or meltdown when things don’t go their way
- Has a limited ability to analyze and reflect on one’s actions and learn from mistakes
- Blames others and takes no responsibility for their actions
- Poor boundaries
- Avoids challenges, wants life to be easy
To put our overeating behind us, we will have to grow up! Growing up means dealing with life on life’s terms. Maturity means leaving behind childish fantasies of having the perfect life and accepting life as the uncertain, imperfect package that it is, not how we want it to be. It means learning to roll with the punches and realizing that there are no quick fixes or short cuts out there for us.
It means being willing to put in the hard work, sacrifices, and effort that the best things in life require. We become willing to invest in ourselves when we give up the fantasy that someone is going to rescue us, take care of us, or magically fix us. If we want what we want, we are going to have to give it to ourselves. Cinderella truly was a fairytale after all.
Mindfulness is very helpful for poor impulse control and emotional regulation. Mindfulness teaches us that we aren’t our thoughts or emotions; we can learn to detach and not react to them. Mindfulness also helps us to pause and reflect before acting on our urges and to delay gratification.
Pausing is like a muscle, the more we do it, the stronger and better we become at it. The more we abstain from temptations, the better we feel about ourselves and our confidence grows. As we start to see results, we gain the momentum and the motivation to keep going after our goal.
Ready to become the star and heroine of your own life? How you do food is how you do life! Contact me for a free consultation!
Feast for the Eyes – Photo by Catherine L. Taylor
Reflective Questions, Thoughts and Quotes
- Immaturity wants it to be easy, makes excuses, and complains a lot. Maturity sets about getting it done.
- Before giving in to temptation, I pause and ask myself, “Is this aligned with what I really want and how I want to feel?”
- The best things in life come to those who are willing to put in the effort and wait for the results. Are you weighting or waiting?
- Feelings aren’t facts. Don’t act on or make decisions when you’re feeling emotional. Take a break and learn to sit and breathe through them. Feelings will soon pass.
I easily resist temptation.
I pause before acting on my impulses.
I delay gratification easily.
I am the heroine of my own life.
I can give myself the things I really want in life.
I am my best investment.
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Join me for a free teleseminar with JASI – Joy and Success International on May 14, 2013 at 2:00 PM EST. You can register for it at http://catherinetaylor.eventbrite.com.
Can’t make it? Don’t worry. There will be a recording of it available later.
Is emotional eating keeping you from losing weight and living the life you want? Are you ready to master your weight and your life?
If so, you may be a candidate for coaching. Coaching can make the difference between success and failure.
I have found that people who struggle with food and emotional eating are released from that prison once they learn the skills of mindful awareness and mindful eating, emotional self-nurturing, developing a spiritual or meditation practice, and learning to set appropriate limits and goals.
This turns off the urge to overeat and engage in other compulsive behaviors. When you feel better, you eat better! I have walked this path myself, and it has led me to peace and freedom.
The goal of my coaching is to create a lighter, balanced, healthier, nourishing and joy-filled life. You will begin to see results in all areas of your life because How You do Food is How You do Life!®
I coach and mentor people in the areas of: permanent weight loss, food addiction, compulsive, emotional overeating, binge eating recovery, creative self expression, spiritual direction, mindfulness, meditation, self care and stress management, self esteem and body image issues.
Note: My work is spiritually focused, not religious, and fits with any belief system you may have, even agnostic. My work assumes that you have all the wisdom and answers you need inside of you.
What you call this place — God, intuition, Higher Power, inner wisdom, or True Self — is up to you. I am simply a guide bringing you back to the truths that are already inside of you.
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Catherine L. Taylor’s Thinnerisms®
How You do Food is How You do Life!®
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